Happy New Year's Eve!

So I'm writing right now - wide awake but exhausted at 1:20 in the morning, baby kickin' and flipping around like an Olympic gymnast in my belly, and heartburn raging up my throat as if I'm about to breath fire at any given moment. Cute, right? e_e;


Anyhow... I'm making a promise to myself for 2013 that, once my son, and final child is born into this crazy world that I am going to take control of my weight loss like never before in the past and drop 40-50 lbs by December of next year. I'm going to try to reach this goal in 8-9 months. Hell, if it takes to Jan of 2014 then I'd be happy with that too lol.

I'm currently wavering between 195-198 lbs right now. Eh. I've gained roughly 10-12 lbs so far this pregnancy. Not too bad for 6 months... but we still have 14-16 weeks to go and with my old track records... I'll be tipping past 200 here before we know it and hopefully not past 210. I reached 235 with Emma... with a starting weight of 160?? *cringe*...Kaelyn I got to 200-210? I'm holding my breath now lol.

Moving on -- I'm feeling pretty good mobility wise but I can tell my energy levels are depleting some. I'm still on 88mg of synthroid and I do believe this has helped with swelling and weight gain, along with me hardly being able to eat a ton. This last week I've gone into a dairy binge... and milk has been on my hard-core cravings list. Dr. says its a calcium deficiency... but to pace myself because too much will lead to another large baby. Girls both popped out at 9+ lbs a piece. So... I'm guessing he'll be around 8-9 lbs if I keep on where I'm at.

This site here has been a blessing to read as well... http://beforeandafterweightloss.tumblr.com/
LOTS of success stories. Lots of gals who were worse off than I am pregnant now and are a totally different person today. Others smaller and with easier results. All of which are inspiring. If they can do it... I have NO excuse now.

I'm currently researching, studying, and mentally preparing myself for this life style change on diet slowly but surely already... and hoping to hit it full time for when he arrives in April. I'm scared. I'm a picky eater. I don't want to wear spanx forever. Have the sagging skin. Wear pants 2x larger than I should because of the skin flap that sits there and stares up at me because I've stuffed my face while crying on the couch over what pregnancy and poor diet choices have led my body to look like (while not pregnant.)  I'm not going to cave to this any longer and 2013 I WILL hit my weight loss goals and new lifestyle. I'm doing this for ME. My husband. My children. I'm making my husband get up and workout and change his picky eating habits as well. My kids aren't as bad... Emma a bit harder than Kaelyn at the moment but we are going to cut out alot of junk-shit foods that aren't good for us. We have actually in the last 3 months... but will make even more improvements into this new year.

I cringe seeing old photos of myself after I had the girls... a year after I had them. I let myself go. WTF? And seeing kids who are 7-8-9 years old... not with medical issues, but diet issues because of their parents.... sporting waist sizes that are WAY too big for their ages... I refuse to allow my kids to fall into that pit because I"M being lazy on what we choose to feed ourselves.

/end rant

Anyhow -- I'm making this promise to myself and my family that we will have a FANTASTIC new year and I'll have photos and updates to share on here as we approach Jensen's due date in April and post-delivery and so on. Wish me luck because I'm going to need it. XOXO

This weekend marked 6 months down and 4 more to go! Happy New Years everyone! <3